a new beginning...

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

History Lesson

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it. - George Santayana

As I approach the "Big 40" (less than 48 hours away) I can't help but think how well (sadly though) this quote describes my actions over the past few years...actually almost the past 15 years.

Sure - back in 1990-91 I went from 230 lbs. to 180 lbs. Sure - I made some radical changes in my life but for the past decade I feel like I've been treading water. Not sinking, but not really swimming either. I know some of you can relate as I read about it all the time in your posts.

I've seen success. I've also let it slip away. I've been "so close" to my goals, only to let life get in the way and watch them fade in the rear view mirror. So I have to ask myself the question - "Gene, what are you going to do differently in your life that will give you different results?"

I've read all the positive books, listened to Tony Robbins over and over, gone to seminars, got involved in social networking and where has it gotten me. Seems to me right where I've started.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is that we already have all the information we need - too much if you ask me. That's why as a society we jump on the next "big thing" when it comes along. It offers us a renewed sense of hope when in the past we may have failed, perhaps even miserably at times.

I'm going to be 40 years old on Friday. If I live to be 80, that means my life is 1/2 over. That's pretty scary. I've accomplished so many things in my life - some that I'm damn proud of. On the flip side I've done things I'm ashamed of and embarrassed by - shame on me.

I've told myself that the 40's are going to be my best decade yet. I guess that's up to me and only me. There will be no public challenges - no "calling out" coalition members as it's not my style. Instead I feel my strength must come from within.

I must find a way to saddle it and use it on a consistent basis.

Minute by minute.


PS - My wife threw me a surprise 40th B'Day party last week. Totally caught me off guard. It was awesome! Pop has fully transitioned into a nursing home & I'm OK with it - so is he. Dad is moving into a 55+ Community next Monday so I'm renovating the house for my family to move into, hopefully before Christmas.

Despite my ramblings - life is good!